eBay
So I was on eBay, and I was looking for a white leather Michael Jackson purse (don't ask... and Beef, if you reading this, they're impossible to find, so I won't be getting you a replacement purse for Christmas...) But I digress.
I was on eBay, and I was looking for this purse, and as you can imagine, I came across some pretty ridiculous things. And it inspired me to pull my own version of Jay Leno's sketch and look for funny things on eBay (besides white leather Michael Jackson purses...)
Item #1: Ladies Ugly Christmas Holiday Sweater ($6.47)
"This colorful Christmas holiday sweater would be a nice one to wear to the upcoming ugly Christmas sweater parties, or it would just be nice to wear during the holidays."
I put a bid in on this one for Lady G's annual Christmas party.
Item #2: My Neighbor Totoro Plush Doll Toilet Paper Roll Holder ($7.99)
"Brand new Totoro makes a great gift! This plush My Neighbor Totoro makes gift giving a real treat. With soft Totoro fur doll and plush tree doll to enclose your toilet tissue paper roll inside. It's great to place on your desk or car. Cute and nicer way for hold regular the paper roll."
I'm pretty pumped people are coming up with new and inventive ways for me to keep an extra roll of toilet paper inconspicuously stored on my desk.
Item #3: Temptation Island , TV Soundtrack Cd ($0.85)
I actually already own this. It's basically three hours of mellow music with random theatrics interspersed throughout, like *dum dum duuuuuuuuuum!!!* where you're supposed to envision some dude scamming on some other dude's girlfriend, all tropical island styles.
Item #4: Getting Kick Out By Girlfriend Mystery Auction ($1.00)
...
...
WTF?
Item #5: Saco de Toro - Authentic Bull Scrotum, Bullie Bag ($24.99)
"Very unique and absolutely bizarre but a must for your collection. Chihuahua Bullie Bag. Saco de Toro, genuine bull scrotum from an very, large bull. Bullie bag has been preserved and has been outfitted with a leather cord for hanging. Great for hanging dried flowers or just stuff. A conversation piece. No two alike. This one is LARGE and white and VERY HAIRY and defined. Measuring 4" high, 14" around and very hairy. Some customers have filled these with pecans to give as a gift 'nut bag'."
Christmas is coming, you guys. Only 40 days. Make sure to get in on some of these hot deals.
5 comments:
Wow. You cannot make this stuff up.
Re:
#2 "He's sure to win the hearts of all."
#4 - I'm pretty sure this guy sends spam for a living. Aren't you a little curious about the mystery box?
#5 I'm always going around saying "I wish my bull scrotum was more defined and hairy." Glad to hear eBay has answered the call.
Wow.
I'm for sure getting you the mystery box for Christmas, Pants. Or the Torturo seatbelt covers... Or the enlarged scrotum... I CAN'T DECIDE!!!
I am too pleased that you will be wearing #1 to the xmas party. I can see how that is going to look fanastic on you.
I was eating my lunch while reading about the scrotum. I am now feeling a little ill.
But thanks - work sucks at the moment and it was nice to 'get away for a moment', even if it was to read about enlarged scrotums.
:)
I would like to remind you that the sweater is very similar to one that I wore...NON-STOP, after it was given to me by a gentleman friend who you despised!
Kyle?
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